Things that once made sense suddenly don’t

Things that once made sense suddenly don't By Bob Karolevitz A nonsensical unmetered verse of my youth keeps going through my head lately. Like:

Thirty days hath Septober, April, June and no wonder;

All the rest have peanut butter, except grandma, and she rides a tricycle.

It wasn't meant to be understood. It was just a funny take-off on the little poem that told us how many days there are in each month.

Now, however, I find it very symbolic of the times. There are lots of things I don't understand in my fuddy-duddy dotage.

Take television, for instance.

Granted, there are plenty of good shows to watch if you surf enough channels. What causes me to scratch my head in disbelief is much of the advertising.

Maybe I'm just dumb, but too often I have trouble figuring out what the product is. Somebody must know, or why are they spending all those millions for a few seconds of flashing lights?

I finally got so I enjoyed those silly iguanas on the beer commercials. Then the advertising moguls switched to guys sticking out their tongues and making weird noises. Young folks like the grotesque stuff, they tell me, but to me it makes about as much sense as grandma riding a tricycle.

Even Monday Night Football isn't the same since a comedian was added to the panel. Unless I missed it, he hasn't had a good line yet. Shucks, even Howard Cosell was funnier.

Then there's that so-called music.

I try to be open-minded on the different kinds of rock, but the punk noise I don't understand at all, and rap leaves me cold. There's a message in the lyrics, they say. What? About killing and sexual aberration?

Frankly, I'll take Mairzy Doats and Doezy Doats, thank you. It might have been inane, but at least it didn't hurt anybody. Neither did Three Itty Fishies in an Itty Bitty Pool.

I used to be able to read all the comic strips and not have any trouble with them. There were no hidden messages in the antics of the Katzenjammer Kids or even in today's Dennis the Menace. I can empathize with Beetle Bailey because I once was a private, a sergeant and an officer like the captain who doesn't say much.

On the other hand, most of the time Dilbert and Doonesbury are way over my head. Has the world passed me by, or am I too dim-bulbed to know?

I don't try to understand cybernetics, Bill Gates, BCS football ratings, NASA or Nasdaq. I have enough trouble with Medicare forms and all those catalogs they keep sending me when I don't buy anything.

I shouldn't even mention politics.

Like lots of Americans I have always had a religious-like faith in the system. Apparently it all went to pot this time. Maybe Winston Churchill was right after all when he supposedly said: "Democracy is absolutely the worst form of government � except for all the rest."

Sometimes I just want to go back to important questions like Joe Penner's "Wanna Buy a Duck?" Or maybe to verses like:

Thirty days hath Septober, April, June and no wonder;

All the rest have peanut butter, except grandma, and she rides a tricycle.

© 2000 Robert F. Karolevitz

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